get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I need to wash the frat house off of me
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I have tasted many bathrooms
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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