This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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