no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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