The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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