Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
