what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
