thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
