to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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