I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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