the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
