If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I'm passing your future prison.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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