Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
