I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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