I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize
