there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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