The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
