really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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