Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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