she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Couch. On fire.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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