Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
