Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
