He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
