i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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