is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
