I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize