She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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