The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
The power of my boobs compel you
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
