I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
