we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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