either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
