Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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