it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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