ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize