I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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