On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
