Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
