you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
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