When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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