4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Randomize
