Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
This house was built for laser tag.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
