You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Randomize
