I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
