Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Randomize