my sisters under your porch take her home
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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