i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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