I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
My pussy is not your playground.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
