I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
