Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
