I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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