Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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