The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
